Friday, January 29, 2010

An email reply to my republican brother Kenneth...


My Dear Brother Kenneth,

Thank you for your email questioning the wisdom and the efficacy of some of President Obama's proposals for our nation. Don't be afraid. Martinshushu will take care of you when you get too cranky to think properly.

First, a little back story. The source of Martinshushu began many years ago in the 1990's when the wise leaders of the People's Republic of China allowed the transmission all over the Republic of a singular American television series for the enlightenment and productivity of the workers. From that TV show is a photo above of Martianshushu, or "Uncle Martian," or as we called him in the 1960's USA, "My Favorite Martian." Similar to your brother, Martinshushu, Martianshushu was very smart and possessed magical, albeit alien powers like retractable antennae.

Martianshushu was a metaphor for what the regular people of the PRC believed was the key to the power of the USA: alien influences.

But how do the citizens of the USA nation gain access to those powers? It is obvious that in our modern era we need look no further than our own United States Senate. For example, the Minority Leader from Kentucky may or may not have antennae, but Senator McConnell and his cohorts are certainly in touch with some other planet, not this one. The historical record gives us a fitting name for these old guard republicans who delight in obstructing our government. The republicans of the 1850's proudly called themselves "Know Nothings." It remains to be seen if the newly elected Senator from the great, Yankee state of Massachusetts, rises to that standard from the past.

Yes, Scott Brown does look like an iconic new-age right winger. Like the girl-gone-vogue Palin, Scott Brown seems to have only a smudge of dignity. He did pose nude for a national fashion mag. He does drive a pick-up paid for by the RNC. He speaks in vague clichés just like Ronald Reagan. He is a darling new addition to the panoply of Fox and WSJ masturbation fantasies. It should be duly noted that Olberman's diatribe condemning Brown was in fact a tearfully funny lampoon on both the loud, fat OxyContin-head from Seattle, Limbaugh and the sweet little closet queen of Fox, Glenda Beck.

Don't misunderstand me. As Martinshushu, I really think Brown is an okay sort of regular guy. Hopefully the new Brown will look west to Ohio Senator Sherrod Brown for guidance in Washington. Senator Sherrod Brown is a very smart guy who is genuinely attuned to the people of the nation.

Oops, I almost forgot to mention this about elections in Massachusetts: Boston's Mayor Curley in the 1940's was soundly re-elected to office as he sat in Federal Prison on an eighteen month sentence for mail fraud.

Yes, the "Know Nothings" are reborn.

Cheers from the South-Paw Coast,

Darwin's Xenophobe

PS: As an offering of compromise, here's something you can fear: The venerable Directors Guild of America allows every member to vote on which movie, or TV movie, or TV commercial is to be the winner of their DGA Award every year. But for the 2009 movie releases the DGA does not allow the plenary membership to vote on the choice of winner for the Documentary category. The choice is dictated by a "Blue Ribbon Panel." Is the DGA becoming more like the PRC (China)? The regular membership must feel like the Chinese proletariat - or chopped liver anyway.

1 comment:

Victor said...

Forget about the Repugs and the Demoncrats. I voted for Cynthia McKinney. You should have, too.

You know Huey Long. You quoted him before. Have you forgotten," They’ve got a set of Republican waiters on one side and a set of Democratic waiters on the other side, but no matter which set of waiters brings you the dish, the legislative grub is all prepared in the same Wall Street kitchen.”

Øbama sucks like I knew he would.